The Dead Cat Tail Assassins

In the prosperous merchant city of Tal Abisi there is a flourishing trade in assassination. Among the guilds of assassins, the Dead Cat Tails are generally acknowledged to be the best. And among the Dead Cat Tails, Eveen the Eviscerator is one of their star performers. This means that she gets some of the most interesting and challenging commissions.

Even Eveen, however, did not expect to get a commission to kill herself. You see, the thing about the Dead Cat Tails is that they are not cats, nor do they have tails, but they are, most assuredly, dead.

Whether P Djèlí Clark is a fan of Deadpool or not is open to question. What is certain is that similar considerations apply. Being dead, Eveen and her fellow assassins cannot be killed. Being magically re-animated, they heal ridiculously quickly. Which makes them highly formidable fighters. It also allows the author to craft the most fabulously over top fight sequences. After all, written fiction still has far fewer constraints than even the best CGI. If an author can imagine it, they can write it.

However, back to Eveen and her mysterious commission. The person that she is sent to kill is not exactly herself, but rather her younger self pulled through time for the express purpose of being killed by her. What the effect of this young woman’s demise will be on Eveen is unclear. What is clear is that, should she fail to carry out her commission in a timely fashion, she will have violated the third and most important of Clark’s Three Laws of Assassins. (Sorry, they are actually called the Three Unbreakable Vows, but I couldn’t resist the temptation.)

Breaking the Third Unbreakable Vow has consequences. Aeril, the Goddess of Assassins (and Chefs, and anyone else who likes playing with Very Sharp Knives) will notice. Not just Eveen, but her entire guild, will be in deep trouble.

So here we have a lovely set-up. Eveen has just a few hours to work out what the heck is going on, and to avoid the wrath of her fellow Dead Cat Tails and their goddess. Along the way, there can be some fun fights between Eveen and her co-workers.

Clark is clearly having fun here. No more so than when we get to this bit:

“There are three … fools, she spoke at last. “With grand ideas of doing forbidden magic.”
“Edgelords,” Tamu spat with disgust.
“Edgelords?” Sky asked, looking truly puzzled.
“A bunch of privileged pricks,” Eveen answered. “Usually from well-off families who got themselves kicked out of decent colleges. Like to find banned texts or unsanctioned thaumaturgy. The riskier the better. Claim to be freeing magic from restrictions, pushing it to the edge.”

Later in the book we get to meet one of these idiots. And yet, he does tend to start every sentence with the words, “well, actually.”

If that’s not sufficient recommendation for you, I don’t know what would be.

I should also note that The Dead Cat Tail Assassins is a short book, only 213 pages. Clark describes it as a novella, but Locus has decided that it is a novel which presumably means it is just a few words over the 40,000 word limit. I have complained about this sort of mindless adherence to word limits before, but no one seems to care so a Very Short Novel it is. Regardless, you can read it quite quickly.

Title: The Dead Cat Tail Assassins
By: P Djèlí Clark
Publisher: Tor.com
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